Let’s Play Pretend

It took some time. A lot of time. 

What took such time to build, with the sincerest intent,

Took only a day, or two, to unravel.

Unravel, it did. There was no holding on, nor was there looking back. 

Fingers untwined, parting breaths taken, and reluctantly, 

That final bow, the last encore.

It shouldn’t be so hard. It shouldn’t, but it is.

For a bond that had formed and loved genuinely, earnestly, and was the most real.

For a goodbye that held no anger, no hate, no resentment. Was it even goodbye at all?

So what is this tiny, endless hollow that is felt somewhere in the depths of the soul?

Why is it taking longer that expected, than what was hoped for, to put together what had cracked and fallen apart?

Why, when the cards had been dealt and packed away, does it hit harder than it did the day before?

Two steps forward, one step back. The echoes resound differently at each time.

What’s done and dusted for one, may still hold real and true for the other.

What’s crystal-clear in beautiful color for one, may have become a wispy shadow of a memory for the other.

So make no apologies for how we choose to deal.

No apologies for what it takes to heal.

No promises for how long the silent journey.

No regrets for how we unpack and what may come next.

Because there is no pretending, is there?

The choices that were made and the promises that no longer hold.

The words that were spoken, and the stories that were told.

What had happened was done,

And what was done had slipped through and, perhaps, gone.

Because there is no pretending, is there? 

Of the music that had played its course,

The melody for which the heart longs,

And the memory for which it beats…still.